Monday, August 8, 2011

Suicidal confessions



I cry myself to sleep every night,
i am tired of seeing them fight,
the noise keeps penetrating deep inside,
i wanna die or might soon commit suicide.

I scratched myself tonight,
coz the struggling pain was suffocating my sight,
their flew rivers of salt down my face,
how to hurt myself were thoughts at race.

When you haven't seen happiness much,
there is nothing you believe exists such.
Existence is forcefulness you breath with,
keep wondering is living worth the knit?

Blade is lying in wardrobe,
or hanging breathless on a rope,
jumping off a building flying,
if all failed it wont be much fun on bed rest lying?

'Get help' you would suggest,
i keep things to myself i would somehow digest,
i helped a thousand souls in all times,
i desperately wanna slit my throat and make 2 lines.

Getting stoned might be fun,
delusional but my mind will be on its run.
What mental state have i gained,
i hope life, i will not see you again!

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Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Remember me as you knew "someone"


Words you said,
hurts real bad.

I don't mind you not being there when i need you,
i do mind me not being there if you ever need me to.

May be selfish i am,
may be i am mad too.

i need no love from you,
i ain't crying for the memories too.

what matters to me is your presence in life,
i am truly happy for your to-be wife!

I didn't ask for much,
just your friendship and not to be in constant touch!

Our things from past,
were all great till it last.

My frankness in talks may make you feel lame,
but trust me i ain't playing any game.

I can live with the memories of our friendship for the years to come,
till you don't call, message or ping that you remember me as you knew 'someone'!

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Thursday, May 5, 2011

No Reason To Fall In love

I didnt need a reason to fall in love,
i didnt need a season to fall in love,
i didnt need a decision to fall in love,
i just needed you, so i could fall in love..

i didnt need no time,
i didnt need no wind chime,
i didnt need no flowers,
i didnt need no fling..

i didnt need no power,
i didnt need to climb a tower,
i just wanted to be touch,
and feel your love too much..

now, i dont need this sight,
nor do i wish to see the light,
want to just lie right here,
with you by my side or near..

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Monday, June 28, 2010

Broken glass on the window


Travelling fast,
speed on the road,
Life is on the track,
i wished it continued without any setbacks.


I travel with the bus,
wherever the tyers take, we rush
I am on the body, on its side,
People see me as i stay above the ads.


Among many like me, i stand out
Coz i am a broken glass on the window of a volvo.
My life’s ok, no regrets,
No friends but tyers were my enemy since the start.


They always took the wrong tracks,
But blamed the driver whose instincts lacks.
i have 2 scars on me,
No wonder they always have curtains,
So that travelers can’t see me.


Today’s a different day, a red lady came and took a seat closest to me,
She wanted to see, see outside at the crazy and fast world,
The curtains were tightly tucked in so the ugly me can be forbidden from the view of others,
She instructed for my releasement from the clutches of the curtain folds,
The cleaner disagreed but finally gave up.
she was stubborn to see what was kept away, i took a deep breath,
knew my freedom is short lived,
but assumptions are not always reality.
She saw my scars, i saw her - simple but beautiful,
she trembled a bit, i thought maybe i have reached the end,
she, touched the curtain, i took a deep breath,
to my surprise she opened it completely,
i was free again, Yippee i said to myself.


She kept staring at me.. must be seeing through
concentrated on my scars,
My eyes glued on her,
with shivering fingers, unsure of her actions,
she touched my scares. Her cold touch smoothened all my pain and tiredness
She realized that the inner me was intact and the outer me was completely broken,
she felt me up again and again,
she smiled and titled her head on me,
i could feel her hair touching me and wondered the smile was not sympathy but empathy,
she could feel my pain, my life, my gains,
the sides of her lips brushed on me,
the pink lipstick shade stuck on me,
was happy and sad at the same time,
we were on a sand clock running short on time.
Time space theory was decreasing,
the destination was coming closer every second.
I wish i could stop time and keep her with me forever mine.


The bus took a sunned jerk, she work up hurdled,
Collected her bags and rubbed her eyes.
Her destination was a few minutes away.
did she care for me anyway?
About to get up she looked at me,
Brought her lips closer to me,
my heart sank, did she realize i was staring,
no i think not, she wanted to see her reflection,
She stood up to leave and i bid her goodbye in my way,
i felt the pain of separation from a loved one,
she came back for a magazine she forgot,
i thought again she stared for reflection, but before she left
spoke a few words that changed my life, I was satisfied
someone finally understood me, the reason for my prolonged survival
Her words ' We both are same, Hurt by others, Both suffers from smoothness outside but scars inside!"


Suddenly i heard a scream,
it was my colleague, placed opposite to me,
it was as if someone shot at him,
i saw a stone pass through him like a bullet,
Unexpectedly which came flowing towards me,
its a realization of my life coming to an end.
its going to be my last breath, i knew
then i turned my face coz i was scared to see death in its eyes
saw her outside, i wished i could just see her eyes, just once,
my last wish was fulfilled when the stone hit through me like a bullet
must be the same kind of pain
my heart flew, pieces of me scattered in the air,
one part went somewhere, somewhere cold, watery and dark.
but now at last i was satisfied coz after sometime i realized where did i land,
was in her eyes, forever stored.
She lost her eyesight which i feel guilty for but now i will be with my love.


Forever & ever to come..

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Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Soulmates?!

Is this what i had always dreamt about?
A world where i could always shout.
he had given me those dreams,
but now i am left alone and scream.

My happiness is gone with him,
I could see my dreams seeping in.
I wish i could change all the things,
and fly with him on the cloud wings.

For millions of years to come,
How could i ever be so dumb?
The dreams that he gave were never mine,
No wonder they never could shine.

are the bridges forever?
if they were, why werent we together ever?
Life is good even without you now,
but i wonder why sometimes i still drown.

Drowing into the wonderland was fun before,
now i can only see the illusions of oasis burn.
The ashes of my hopes keep falling from the sky,
which restricts my vision from seeing any high.

You are gone and the sun has set,
Orchids are the symbol of undying love,
Then why is autum there and the springs gone?
only the dead petals are left.

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Unspoken Love - Dad

it feels sad,
i feel bad.
i am tied,
to the wrong side.

i wonder why,
i cant try,
to converse with him,
for more then seconds five.

haven't spoke to him,
since i left the nest,
far away i flied,
increasing the distance wide.

i tried to get in touch,
but its always been shruged.
speaking to people aside,
i tried to hear his voice.

cant believe after so many years,
he doesnt wish to lend me his ears,
its all cause of the words of ill,
that trusted people fill,
its not a surprise,
that he never tried,
to talk to me now,
the drills have gone to deep to filled how?

i cry thinking on the side,
when other enjoy their pride.
love they got keeps growing,
mine has lost without knowing!

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Monday, October 15, 2007

mask of love

Dont think i can talk
as i am sleeping off..
i think you wont stop
till you piss me off..

i have a body, mind and soul..
Stop humping me,
I aint no pole..

I have taken so much of physical and mental abuse..
Emotionally am too drained and tired to argue..

Whats the difference between you and the terrorist-rapist-killer and all..
Except that you wore a mask of love and they do not!

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